Miscellaneous

All I want for Christmas…

Dear Santa, I’m told there is no way I’m going to get what I want for Christmas this year. I’ve been reassured by Mummy that there is absolutely no way I am getting one of the things I covet most in the world. I’ve asked Daddy if he could get me one – it can’t be that difficult, they’re everwhere! Everywhere I go there are at least half a dozen, and they’re just so cute, loveable and squishy, that I can’t resist. But Daddy says no… 🙁 The Bug has made his list, and M&D aren’t arguing about it, so …

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Wot So Funee? Pandora’s Box

The transition to Key Stage 2 and Junior School has been fun, but hard work. I have loved it, relishing the challenge of something new, enjoying learning so much about the ancient Greeks, earning house points for my appreciation of mythology, focusing on the weekly value – respect, ambition, enterprise, teamwork… It has, however, been a very long half-term. At parent’s evening last week my teacher detailed to M&D what a pleasure I had been, how helpful, supportive, hard-working, and willing to have a go. But 8 weeks is a long stretch; it is something that Daddy dismissed as nonsense …

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How girl’s dresses change over the years…

  When I was a toddler, I think I was quite cute. Always chuckling, tiny bunches sprouting off the top of my head, chubby thighs, and as cheeky as they come. Of course, I was a typical toddler, always getting messy, falling down, or  waving around a spoon of something orange until it landed on Mummy, or me. And then there was snot, and other bodily fluids. Ahem… So I needed practical clothes, comfy, easy to move around in, and capable of withstanding a bit of wear and tear at the playgroup, or of handling the hot wash required to …

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10 Rules for your first half-term holiday

So you’ve done it. You’ve completed your first 8 weeks at school, and have earned a well-deserved rest. So what should you be doing with your first half term holiday? NOTHING! That’s right, I said nothing at all. If you, like me, have a white face and shadowy eyes that owe more to 8 weeks of school than to the Halloween grease-paint, you need a break! So here are my 10 rules for your first half-term holiday: Do not pick up a pen, under any circumstances whatsoever! All writing, of any kind, is completely banned. Unless you are marking the …

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Warming Chickpea and Chorizo Casserole 8 ProPoints

"chickpea, chorizo and butternut squash casserole slow cooker"

When I lived in Spain as a student I was astonished at the awful food – until I moved in with some girls who had a cook. Yes, I know, students with a cook! But that’s how seriously these people take their food, and mealtimes. After their various lectures, they would all convene back at the flat at 2pm for a hearty lunch made by Loli (she also ironed and cleaned for them, for a pittance, I seem to remember). My absolute favourite creation from Loli was a chickpea and chorizo concoction; it was invariably laced with gorgeous olive oil, …

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Wot So Funee? How my children see me…

Oh memes, and tags, and spread the word posts. Don’t you just hate them? How at first glance you think, “yeah, so not doing that one.” But you linger just a little bit longer, long enough to smile at the blogger offering herself up to your derision, long enough to think, “actually, that’s funny; that would only take me a couple of minutes, surely?” And BAM! Just like that, you’re hooked, linking yourself up, tagging another blogger, offering yourself up for their derision… This happened to Mummy yesterday; she tried to resist the offer from Kate to show the world …

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GG writes: A Halloween Mystory

Once upon a time there lived somebody called Lord Pumpkin. True to his name he was a pumpkin. He had fiery red eyes, a flaming red mouth, and a gnarled laser shoot. Also living at that time was a cat called Kitty Softpaws. She had sleek black fur and white paws which strangely had no claws; the fur can extend. She owned only a sword and some boots. She and Lord Pumpkin were bitter enemies. Each of them had an army – Pumpkin had Werewolves; Kitty had cats. Now it just so happened, they were about to have a battle. …

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Slow Food Fast

Italian cooking with kids

Which of these images is more appealing to you as a parent? Which would you prefer your child to eat? And which would your child choose? Yeah, us too, and though Mummy tries to make us cut out fast food, we do love the odd Happy Meal. As a family who eats out whenever we can afford it, we were shocked to discover that more than half of meals eaten out in Britain are at fast food restaurants . When we eat 0ut it is at Wagamama, where the Bug’s favourite dish is Chilli Squid, or at Sophie’s Steakhouse, where …

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Wot So Funee? How to change your parents

Prompted by I’m Counting UFO’s #funee post last week I remembered that actually I had wanted to change my Mummy recently. I knew I couldn’t, but after I’d doled out all the requisite slander – “You’re the worst Mummy in the world, you hate me, I hate you, you love the Bug more than me…” I pulled out my best lines to really sock it to her. “I’m going to tell Laura tomorrow, and she’s going to tell her Mum, and then her Mum will hate you too, and you’ll have no-one to speak to on the playground.” Mummy, having …

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My name is GG and I watch TV…

Prompted by a thread on Mumsnet this week Mummy got rather mixed up in a debate over the rights and wrongs of watching TV as a child. It seems some bloke has advocated banning TV entirely for the under-3’s. For God’s sake! The under-3’s?? I have about enough time to eat my tea, go to a couple of playdates, do my homework, complete my music practice, and read a book or several before bed, without worrying about when I’m going to find a window for Tracey Beaker or Horrid Henry. Don’t get me wrong, I will sit for 36 hours in …

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What child marriage really means, and how you can help

My Auntie J lost her sons recently. I don’t mean lost as in she misplaced them – that would have been simply careless, they are in their 20’s after all. But they left home, you see, went off to start their independent lives. Incidentally, I’m kind of hoping that means they might get married, because I’ve never been a bridesmaid… But anyway, I digress. Auntie J has always been a carer: a great mum to her boys, our favourite relative to visit, and a nurse. When she became an ’empty-nester’ she had a hankering to do something different with her …

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Wot So Funee? The Family Chortlequaffer

We’re not big milk drinkers in our house. Mummy says she tickled my ear and sat through endless Baby Einstein recordings in her efforts to make me drink just one more ounce from my baby bottle. The Bug was worse – his dairy intolerance led to him being prescribed a dreadful chemical concoction smelling more like blue cheese than the sweet milk of a baby. Consequently we lost the milk habit very young, and our calcium these days is more likely to come from cheese, broccoli, and dried apricots (did you know, 3 dried apricots contain as much calcium as …

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ONE Mums: What being a Mum means to me…

This week sees Michelle and Jen from BritMums travelling to Ethiopia with ONE Mums, an organisation dedicated to raising awareness of extreme poverty and preventable disease. ONE is not a charity, and is not asking for your money. All they need is for you to add your voice to the movement that is keeping this issue on the political agenda for change. Here’s how you can help: 1. Sign up to ONE using the box above, and add your voice to the campaign. Remember, you will not be asked for money, and it only takes one Mum to grow the fight against …

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Slow-cooked smoky beef casserole: 5 WeightWatchers ProPoints

Slow Cooker Beef Casserole 7 WeightWatchers ProPoints

This weekend Mummy served this slow-cooked smoky beef casserole instead of roast dinner. I was inclined to kick-off, because Sunday roast is my favourite meal of the week. But I found myself sneaking into the utility room to check on the slow-cooker, because the smells wafting out were just so tempting. Once again, Mummy cooked for about 10 minutes and then produced this rich, smoky-scented dinner about 8 hours later! Serves 6: this recipe has been created by us, using the WeightWatchers ProPoints system. It is not a WeightWatchers recipe. You will need: 8oog lean casserole steak, cubed 20g plain …

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I am MAD, bad, and dangerous to know… and where that dress came from!

Ahem. Let’s just get this straight. This is Mummy we’re talking about now, not me. I am, of course, sensible, angelic, and very safe to know indeed. It’s Mummy you want to avoid; especially when she’s been on the popping wine…  Image courtesy of Mummy Daddy Me  If your contact details are in Mummy’s email account you may remember having seen a missive from her sometime around March, asking you to vote for her in the MAD Blog Awards. Probably a bit bemused, some of you did. Others pointed out that she may have upset a vast number of her …

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GG gets a MAD Award from Myleene Klass. And a top night on the town…

Little did I know, when Mummy switched from hand-written to online diary 18 months ago, that the result would be this: GG and Myleene Klass wear Leopard Print for the Schooldays category, sponsored by Startrite Shoes Oh, and this: Friday night saw The MAD’s and we were finalists in the Schooldays Category. For those readers who do not blog,  think “OSCARS” but for Parenting Bloggers (MAD: Mum and Dad), and you’ve got the general idea. Special outfits, speeches, beautiful dinner tables, tears, and an after party… There will be more about Mummy, her outfit, her acceptance speech *yawns* – but …

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Wot So Funee? The Bug

At what age do children really start to make sense, do you think? Recently I have uttered very little in the way of #funee verbal errors. My writing has been logical, with good spelling, and sensible dénouement. Hence I am forced to feature my 5-year-old brother today, and his best friend: Bug: England is the capital of London Bug’s Friend: Wales is in the Kingdom of the United Bug: Manchester United? Bug: I’m having my birthday for camping! BF: Oh, I really wanted to miss you… Bug: Why is your Grandad old? Isn’t that the most disjointed conversation you’ve ever heard?? I have no idea what …

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Finicky Shirts: the one where we discover that Daddy is a really weird shape

My Daddy is a short-arse. I’ve heard him say so himself, so I know I’m allowed to say it too. I’m not sure why then, when I tell my little brother he is a “pain in the arse” I get into trouble for using a square-word. It seems a bit two-faced to me. Anyway, I digest… The fact is that Daddy is a really weird shape. Short legs and arms, more J-Lo than he would like, he finds it difficult to  find a shirt that fits well. Well guess what? We found Finicky Shirts, who will create tailor-made shirts for …

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Wot So Funee? Listography: Top 5 truths – according to women

  Listography is back over at Kate Takes 5, and this week she is featuring the top 5 truths – according to women. You see women (and this is an important distinction to make) tell the best truths, the ones that don’t stop at simple fact, but include all possible intimations and hidden meanings. Women are even good at reading into a situation and finding all the meanings that aren’t there! So women have it covered. Now, add an 8-year-old into the equation and you will discover the most sublime truths ever known to mankind (and women). Top 5 Truths – according …

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Can you really do a posh London restaurant with children?

Guest post from Mummy… Remember the Oxo Tower? The Palais du Jardin? The Ivy? Oh, erm, no – I never did manage to get a reservation there, unless you count the one for dinner on a Monday in 7 months time, at 3.47pm, table back by 4.30 please… Anyway, those were the days, weren’t they? The days before the kids had us eschewing the fine dining in London that we were used to. Yes, those days, the ones which relied on a dual income, plenty of free time, and table manners! Going out for a meal is now more likely to …

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