Parenting

Actually rather good: companies of the year 2013

by Helen I used to work in a customer-facing industry. I learned quickly the very simple art of pleasing a customer or a potential client. I also learned how easy it is to deal with a disgruntled customer, how little it costs in real terms, and how crucial to your business it is to turn a problem around. I wrote about customer service last year. This is a parenting blog, so I don’t write often about business issues, but as a parent I experience a lot of services and products. Most of them are fine, some are terrible; a few …

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Life Lessons: How to be a Feminist

I have wanted to write to my children – especially my daughter -about feminism for a long time. Since I was first targeted by a handful of women who decided that I was sickening, because of the way I write this blog. The trouble is, when a woman writes about feminism, there’s always the chance that a feminist will pitch up and attempt to put her in her place. So I wimped out and asked a man to give me his opinion. Stuart Heritage writes for the Guardian, amongst other gigs, and if you can get past the fact that he …

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Renewing our wedding vows – my promise to you

By Helen, to Jason… M&D 2000 My wedding vows to you… Things I have learned in 13 years of marriage. Marriage is not hearts and flowers. That is romance. It is not expensive dinners and weekends in the country. That is courtship. Although our weekends in the country usually involved a rainy football match in Swindon. I think you’d call that love. Marriage is not white dresses and diamond rings, canapés or cake. (Although cake, it has to be said, is of vital importance to most things). Marriage is not a happy ending. It is socks on the floor, coffee …

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Dancing without stabilisers

By GG and the Bug…    Shhh! More exciting news on the wedding anniversary party. Don’t tell Mummy I’ve hijacked her computer. It’s supposed to be a secret. Remember how we told you that M&D wanted to do a few things differently to their wedding 13 years ago? Well one of those things happens on the dance floor. Last time there had been far too much wine to afford anything more than a shuffle during their first dance. In fact, as Mummy tells it, Daddy used her to help him remain on his feet for the whole of Shania Twain’s You’re …

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Life Lessons: How to have the wedding you want

By Helen… Dear children, 13 years ago today your Dad and I had the most amazing party. It was bonfire night, and we’d booked fireworks for our wedding celebrations. There was an Abba tribute band, terrible food, and too much wine; no-one wanted to go home. Looking back, I wouldn’t have changed much of that day at all, but there were many things I wished we had done differently in the months preceding our big day, and a couple of them have nagged at me over the years. When your own big days come – if and when you decide …

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I took the Savage Challenge. Will you?

Would we take the savage challenge and eat the grasshoppers?   Today sees the start of the Savage Challenge blogger book tour, and I’m delighted to kick off the challenge by telling you a little bit about both the tour, and the book which inspired it. Over the next 20 days, 20 fabulous bloggers will be setting you a #savagechallenge. Read on to discover the theme for today’s challenge. Discover the Savage World The book itself is the kind of read that children won’t notice they’re reading – even reluctant readers very quickly start to find themselves immersed in discovering …

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Pocket Money: Wot so Funee?

From the lips of the Bug… I have an axe to grind with Mummy. You see, we’re supposed to get £2 each every Saturday, but we forget to ask, or she forgets to pay, or we’re out without money when we remind her. It’s all very convenient… She has promised to set up a Roosterbank or PKTMNY account for us so that money can be sent magically from her account to ours every week by pocket money fairies. I’m not exactly sure how I get it out of there to spend it, but I’m not fussy, if it’s in my …

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7 things you need to pack when camping with kids

I dragged my parents camping several times this summer. Some of it they enjoyed (namely, the parts where they were asleep, and the parts where they were drinking cider), some of it they didn’t. I enjoyed ALL of it. I know how to have a good time, and so I offer you my best tips for getting rid of the camping jitters and throwing yourself into the spirit of camping with kids. What to take when camping with kids Friends: there is nothing like a couple of middle-aged people whining about boredom to wreck your holiday. There are fields full …

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Losing gracefully – a life lesson

Dear GG, some time ago you had to prepare for a big event at school. To coincide with the anniversary of Martin Luther King’s momentous speech, the entire school would deliver individual speeches to their peers, on a subject of their own choice. You would be judged by your class, and a winner selected to go through to the school final. You prepared for this speech day after day after day. You really took on the challenge, researching your chosen theme – the marshmallow – and writing up your notes. You put together 2 minutes of facts and opinion, some …

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7 reasons why you want to be a Center Parcs blogger in 2014

This year I was a Center Parcs blogger. What this means is that I had a bit of a giggle joining in with challenges every month and writing about them on the blog, and then I had a free holiday at Center Parcs. As an 8 year old, anything which forces my mother into the craft box with me is welcome, so I can thoroughly recommend it from that perspective. You too can be a Center Parcs blogger! Center Parcs are now looking for next year’s recruits, so I thought I’d give you 7 reasons why you might like to …

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Tips for dealing with mean girls

Are you a bully? Some types of bullying are less obvious than others

  My darling girl, the time has come for me to tell you about girls. Girls are complicated creatures – I know you’ve got that nailed, you are complicated yourself! Girls can be wonderful, loyal, warm, supportive, nurturing, caring, and funny. They can share everything with you and make you feel like the best person in the world. But they can bring you down with a word – no, a look – and they can destroy your confidence. If you let them. Mean girls: they can be total bitches. I want you to be better than that. You are already better than …

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Warning: These 5 Mistakes Will Destroy Your Boys Birthday Parties

Yesterday was the Bug’s 6th birthday party. It’s tough having a birthday in the middle of the summer holidays, and there is always someone who can’t make it to the party, so we try really hard to make sure my brother has a good time. Last year we made some mistakes, so this year we opted for something entirely different. He enjoyed both parties, but the adults needed wine with their curly ham sandwiches on both occasions. So with the benefit of hindsight, here are the 5 mistakes we think you should avoid: Do’s and don’ts for boys birthday parties …

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Family friendly restaurants: why kids are getting a raw deal

I am a girl who likes her food. My restaurant travels are well-documented on this blog, and I have often turned restaurant critic in an endeavour to give praise and recognition where it’s due. So I’m aghast today at news that most food outlets – yes, including the so-called “family friendly restaurants” – are falling drastically short of providing healthy and interesting children’s meals. So I’m asking for your help. Family friendly restaurants are giving kids a raw deal Out to Lunch is a review of children’s food offers across restaurants from high-street chains to celebrity dining venues. Undertaken by kids …

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Giving a speech – tips from a drama queen

In 9 days time, my Mum will be giving a speech at BritMums Live. I know this because of the incessant chuntering that forms the backdrop to my teatime and bathtime routine. I have also been asked to listen to excerpts from the post she will be reading and provide my critique. I have obliged her with my best advice: Tips on giving a speech from an expert in drama The Bug and I attend Stagecoach classes every weekend. Being centre-stage is something we strive for daily, so we thought it best to get some formal training. So when Mummy …

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It’s more fun outdoors

Last week I took delivery of this: Almost instantly it began to rain. Undeterred, we made it our mission to let the roof down, as often as possible, irrespective of temperature. The sole purpose of the day, for the whole family, was getting out in the Mini Cooper. Instead of whiling away half the day wondering what to do, we went out and found it. When I say “it,” I actually mean nothing at all. We didn’t do stuff, we just went places. And we surprised ourselves with the results. We saw bluebells (really late this year!): I always love …

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Make believe: when will it stop? Wot so Funee?

 Seriously? Give me a break! When does make believe stop? At “coming up to 9” I’m a tiny bit pleased that GG still holds firm to make-believe. But seriously, I wonder if I’m being played? *Sighs* anyone know where I can get mermaid stationery? In bulk…? Now, if you have your own post to link this week, grab the badge code from the sidebar, and click the link below to enter your post – I can’t wait to see what you have! It’s not obligatory, but if you include a link back here in your own post, I’ll return the …

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Homework: Wot so Funee?

My daughter is a funny writer. When she puts her mind to it, she can write witty commentary filled with wonderful adjectives and characterisation. But she’s easily bored, and – if I’m going to be more honest than a loving mother ought to be – a tad lazy. Her teachers, enjoying what she writes when inspired, have always seen fit to encourage her into increased written productivity. It hasn’t always worked. Creative writing: This year she has a lovely teacher who has ventured into the dangerous waters of loosening the reins on her creativity. For our recent holiday to Florida, …

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Wot so Funee? Brownie Pack Holiday

I recently spent my first nights away from my family. There was a lot of excitement, and a bit of emotion in the days before I went. I even said I didn’t want to go, but that was more out of compassion for Mummy’s impending peace and quiet limbo than an actual desire to forfeit the freedom of my first Brownie Pack Holiday. I had my bags packed 3 days before departure, rising early each morning to double check I had everything I needed. I sniggered as Mummy attempted to paint my name on my matching plastic crockery – with nailpolish, …

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Do you really want to be a parent?

Why is it that we never tell expectant parents the truth? Parents wax lyrical about the joys of being a parent. Like a cheerful gang of die-hards, they laugh off the well-quoted exhaustion, discuss – endlessly – the requirement for wine, and welcome each new recruit with a knowing smile and a wink of collusion to the gang behind your back. And you learn. You learn to cope, you learn what those winks meant, and you learn to worry… Finally, I’m going to tell you the truth about parenting: For non-parents, weekends bring fun and games: maybe a couple of beers …

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