funny

Priceless jewellery: Wot so Funee?

We spotted a friend’s Facebook post last night that made us giggle. Steph gave us permission to quote her lovely daughter and her playdate friend, who were reading the recent anniversary edition of Girl Talk magazine. The copy featured the first ever giveaway Girl Talk had done, a free choker necklace. The overheard conversation went like this: – “What’s a choker?”– “It’s a necklace so fat that it makes you choke.”– “Why are they giving it away then?”– “Cos nobody would buy it!”– “Ah yeah good point.” As an aside, whilst my Mum was styling this choker that I made at …

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Weather in Florida: Wot so Funee?

Funee is thin on the ground at the moment, with dead serious taking its place at an alarming rate. So I went sifting through our draft posts – you know, those half written anecdotes designed to remind me of detailed scenarios and enthralling witticisms. Sadly they never quite manage the feat of recalling memory, but I did happen across this one, from our Florida holiday last year. I think it’s strangely appropriate for a Britain in the grip of floods. And as today sees my mum in a flimsy Buzz Lightyear costume, scooting for Sport Relief, I am praying that …

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Saturday is Caption Day

I haven’t joined in with #SatCap for a while, but I couldn’t not this week after Mummy snapped me having a chillout in the bath. SatCap is hosted at Mummy Never Sleeps this week – do your worst 😉

When I grow up: Wot So Funee?

  When I grow up When I’m 30 years old I will live 1 kilometre from my current home. I will live in a mountain, on a house. Hmmm. You need to have a rethink darling. We live in Hertfordshire; there are no mountains here, and all you will find within one kilometre is a 1950’s housing estate and 5 Tesco metros. Unless of course your mountain is metaphorical, which it would have to be, were you to actually build it on top of a house. I do hope the house in question is not our current abode – I think …

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A BIG night in with Lucky Voice online karaoke (review)

Did you read that? What it says on the box? Oh, yes! Mummy is never going to get access to her laptop ever again!  Because this karaoke party kit arrived last week from Lucky Voice, and now I’ve got the hang of it, I’m planning to exercise my vocal chords every opportunity I get. Lucky Voice have a chain of upmarket Karaoke bars across the country, but this is the first time they have ventured into our homes online. My Mum is rubbish with technology, so she had a bit of a faff trying to set the party kit up, …

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Athlete’s Foot: Wot so Funee?

Image credit  Very short, but very snort-worthy this week. A quick story about athlete’s foot, from a friend of mine. Finishing off her bath-time routine, E notices the tin of athlete’s foot spray perched on the corner of the bath: E “Oh, by the way Mum, that stuff doesn’t work.” Mum: “What do you mean?” E: *shrugs* “Just that it doesn’t work, I sprayed some on my feet and it made no difference.” Mum: “What? Why did you spray it on your feet?” E: *huffs* “Well, obviously, I wanted to run faster. Like I said, it doesn’t work…” Wot? Wot so Funee? …

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How to make your parents work less and play more with you: Wot so Funee?

If your parents are anything like mine, they spend far too much time working, and not enough time paying attention to their children. If that sounds familiar, I have a top tip for ensuring you get a full afternoon of decent engagement out of them. Just follow these step-by-step instructions. Getting them to work less and play more Insist on being taken to a grown-up’s party the day before you hatch your plan. Bear with me here, there is very good reason for this. Endure the 2 hour journey with a minimum of whining. On arrival, politely thank your hosts …

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Sibling Harmony: Wot So Funee?

I am back from my little project (more on that soon) and am indebted to Just a Normal Mummy and Mummy Never Sleeps for hosting this linky for the last 2 weeks. Not only did they do a hilariously good job of posting, and sharing all your lovely posts, they also broke the record for the number of people linking up! Apparently you were bribed with gin in week 2. I’m not averse to bibery, and I have just been through Duty Free (I have a LOT of Haribo) – just saying… There is often a fair bit of dischord …

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Barbie breaks world record… Saturday is caption day…

This is the scene that greeted Mummy when she went to clean up the bathroom after our bedtime story. What on earth happened here? And if that’s whet your appetite, click the badge for more caption opportunities… Nominations are now open for the 2013 MAD Blog Awards. I was delighted to win the Best Schooldays category last year, all down to my lovely readers. I’d love to be in with a chance again this year, so if you’d like to give me a nomination click here to enter my blog address http://staging.actuallymummy.co.uk  You can nominate in any category but I think my best …

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Saturday is caption day…

Now, for those of you who don’t know this pair personally, I can tell you that their expressions tell you more than words ever could… (Mummy)

Wot so Funee? Top Christmas present for big kids (and Dads)

STOP!! If your name is Actually Daddy, stop reading this post right now. I said stop………… Do not. Scroll down. Any further. Unless you want to ruin your Christmas surprise. It is lovely. It’s a lovely selection of pants, to be honest, and the Christmas jumper is to die for, but really, you wouldn’t want to spoil the paper-ripping  effect, now would you? Has he gone…? Right, let’s get on with this. Because I have a cracking Christmas present for Daddy this year. He is going to love it. Is it just my Dad, or is it Dads everywhere that …

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Wot So Funee? The Family Chortlequaffer

We’re not big milk drinkers in our house. Mummy says she tickled my ear and sat through endless Baby Einstein recordings in her efforts to make me drink just one more ounce from my baby bottle. The Bug was worse – his dairy intolerance led to him being prescribed a dreadful chemical concoction smelling more like blue cheese than the sweet milk of a baby. Consequently we lost the milk habit very young, and our calcium these days is more likely to come from cheese, broccoli, and dried apricots (did you know, 3 dried apricots contain as much calcium as …

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Wot So Funee? Listography: Top 5 truths – according to women

  Listography is back over at Kate Takes 5, and this week she is featuring the top 5 truths – according to women. You see women (and this is an important distinction to make) tell the best truths, the ones that don’t stop at simple fact, but include all possible intimations and hidden meanings. Women are even good at reading into a situation and finding all the meanings that aren’t there! So women have it covered. Now, add an 8-year-old into the equation and you will discover the most sublime truths ever known to mankind (and women). Top 5 Truths – according …

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Wot So Funee? A riddle

As you know, I have the best intentions to write intelligent, informative prose. All too often my efforts result in laughs from the adults around me. However, Mummy did a double take at one of my recent school efforts which, although funny, she thought was rather clever. Read on for a riddle by me… Do not scroll down yet! I want you to give this your best effort before you skip to the bottom, where you will find the entire masterpiece, complete with answer. In the meantime, as you wrestle with your grey cells, you can grab my badge from …

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Wot so Funee? More Mums with Nappy Brain!

Last week I may have mentioned how one post-natal Mum embarrassed herself mightily due to the factor I like to call “nappy brain.” Blame it on hormones, tiredness, or the aging process, it seems there are a large amount of Mums with nappy brain. Take a look at these ladies if you don’t believe me! Missing Sleep, on a trip to the swimming pool, discovered she couldn’t get her locker open. She got the staff to break into to get her clothes out, and then panicked because it was empty. After raising the roof about her stolen clothes, it began …

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Wot So Funee? Mums with nappy brain!

Mummy uses this feature each week to highlight some of the  things the Bug and I say and write that make her laugh. That’s fine; I’m a big girl, I can take a bit of nonsense if it makes her happy. What she neglects to include though, are the random gaffs that come out of the mouths of Mums with nappy brain. This week I am redressing the balance! Never let Mums with nappy brain out unsupervised: About 3 months after I was born, Mummy set off with two other new Mummies for a girls weekend. There were three adults …

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Wot So Funee? The Weird Forest (a short story)

by GG I like to read. I like to write. I read fast. I write fast. I am easily bored, so what may begin it’s foray onto paper as genius styling and witty prose, could well tail off into an ugly scrawl as I lose patience and start to crave a skipping rope. At school I have frequently been praised for a good start, then reprimanded for metaphorically wandering off the page and into my neighbour’s pencil case. Wot so funee about that?? C’mon, let me know!!! Now, if you have your own post to link this week, grab the …

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If you give a girl 5 minutes…. Wot So Funee?

If you give a girl 5 minutes she could: Make a new potion for her “potion club” …… using bubble bath, soap, toothpaste, lipgloss, body glitter …. and nail polish Clean up the sink with toilet paper….. and try to wash the evidence down the plug hole Create a swimming pool for her Barbies….. and forget to switch the tap off Have a paddle… Try to mop up an inch deep of water on the bathroom floor….. with toilet paper Admit to her mistake….. and not be able to keep a straight face Today is Wot So Funee? but last …

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Are Linky’s a thing of the past?

Friends, I have bad news. Sunfun is not well. It started off quite hale and hearty, then succumbed to the affliction that is Silent Sunday. It spluttered its way through for a while, laughter being the best medicine and all that, but in the end the virus took a hold, the Silent bacteria grew, and this linky could no longer resist the onslaught of flashlights and zoom lenses. Today the #sunfun linky will breathe its last breath and become a thing of the past. Don’t worry, we’re not bitter; the Lady of Silent Sunday is still our great friend, and …

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Sunday Funny! Yorkshire Pudding and other Bugisms

Today with #SunFun I am going back to my Wot So Funee? roots. Mummy jots down our funny incidents for posts such as these, and has been trawling her note book for inspiration. She has decided to have a good old clearout, so here are some gems from our daily life for you to giggle at: As you know, the Bug is doing very well with his learning to read, but at the very beginning he was a bit of a chancer. He and Mummy were looking at a First Words book, and to get him started she sounded out …

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