For the first time I am joining in Listography at Kate Takes 5. Kate has asked for our top 5 bands to see at a gig. So to Kate, and to Mummy and all her friends, who like to think they are grown up and serious: ‘I am sorry’. But let me tell you, you do not have the monopoly on knowing who all the cool bands are. So here is my list: Miley Cyrus – like, duh, even my Dad wants to see her! Lady GaGa – she has the most amazing costumes, and I really need to check why …
Today at school pick-up my teacher headed out into the playground. We all stopped and watched because this can sometimes be a bad sign. With a mounting sense of fear I realised she was heading for my mummy. I knew I had not had a bad bump today, so this could mean one of two things: either I was in trouble, or mummy was (she helps out in school and sometimes gets the sticking-in wrong). Turns out it was both of us, and this was the reason: Not very ladylike Oh, and this, of course: Mummy’s cyberfriend Tara at Sticky …
Dress-up race I have a few. Sports Day should be about fun, teams, joining in. Hence the Carousel, where you get to try out fun stuff, with friends. I will happily put on the wig, jump in a sack, throw the foam javelin, and waddle with a balloon between my knees in the name of sporting fun. I may be quite good; I may not, but I will have fun nontheless. The Bug did well this year. Not fast, but with a really good strategy, he won the egg-and-spoon, the bean-bag on head, the sack race. M&D made a pact not …
Grandad’s Christmas Cake Board My Grandad is the best. Always handy with a bag of sweets, the first to spot the ice-cream stall, a sucker for bright red icing at Christmas, especially if it came with a singing cake board! A competition with Grandma on every visit to see how much sugar each could get into us. But then, isn’t that what Grandparents are for? Mummy frowns a lot at people who stuff us full of sugar, and you were no exception Grandad. I remember the day I first understood about Heaven; it was …
Your kids will never know they’re eating vegetables!
Mummy, I love you, goodness knows that I do. But be realistic. You are 44, not 24; some choices just aren’t you. The frilled bikinis, the all-in-one playsuits, the skorts (omg) – they are just not right. I know you were young, you say you were cool, but really, don’t go there, pleeeease? Don’t get me wrong, you do have style. But the things you desire look better on me. Frills, lace, feathers, they’re chic. But make sure they’re my size – I can carry them off. I love your clothes, I want them for me . I can’t wait till I fit in your wedding …
I wrote last week how Mummy won a ticket to Cybermummy. She is usually a firm believer in the theory that it is impossible to win anything in a lottery-style competition, having grappled regularly with the tests in Reader’s Digest as a child and won nothing. She was never selected from a random draw to appear on Jim’ll Fix It either. So began, at the age of 11, a lifetime of cynicism and can’tbebotheredness. So she was astounded by her luck in winning the golden ticket! Off she trotted to London, smug, but bemused by this unexpected good fortune. Well friends, you’ll …
His Father’s Son I think I’ve mentioned Daddy’s love of stock car racing. He is desperate to race himself, but Mummy won’t let him for fear of what could happen. So he contents himself with dragging us to race meetings every now and then. I take a stack of books and beg for ice-cream, sweets, chips, airhorns, anything to create a diversion and get me through the day. The Bug takes an altogether more fanatical stance on the event, showing up with his picnic chair and settling in for the duration. Does the pink Disney princess chair bother him? Not …
Every year the Bug and I make something at school as a gift for Father’s Day. Usually colorful, sometimes edible, often unidentifiable, and always heartfelt. This year, in addition to the usual offerings, we gave Daddy a gift which, although inedible and unwearable, surpassed all expectations. We took him to watch Stock Car racing. In the rain. For the uninitiated, this is an event where beaten up cars compete in a series of races for the unenviable privilege of entering a final ‘demolition derby’ – a fight to the death for cars which sometimes only have 2 wheels to begin …
Blogging is pretty new to Mummy, but at a recent bloggers networking event she met a whole crew of local mummy bloggers in our area. She had heard of most of these ladies, but had no idea that they lived just round the corner. So when they invited her to join their gang on a night out she was thrilled. A social life is something she seems to crave, although why, when she has so many Rainbow Fairy books, Polly Pocket dolls, and Moshi Monster cards at home, is completely beyond me. She quietly anticipated a champagne-fuelled lunch, or a …
I did it! Six and a half years in, two and a half since my ‘bicycle birthday’ I finally wobbled my way to independence! There have been many slanging matches along the way, several threats to give my bike to the charity shop, and numerous months when my wheels lay quietly at the back of the garage, waiting for me to be ready. Well suddenly, this week, I was ready. Setbacks that would have previously seen me screaming with uncontrollable delusions of failure caused a mere shrug and a hop back into the saddle. Fruit pastilles magnified the motivation levels …
My Daddy gets seasick. I know this now because we went on a ferry to Guernsey last week and he couldn’t manage anything beyond ‘aaargh that was a bad one’ for the whole trip. He has spent the first 3 days of our holiday panicking about the return journey, and I’m sure from his reaction that no-one has ever felt as bad as he did. At the time I was pretty nonchalant, but now I am concerned. He has developed a new-found obsession with a website called windfinder.com, which he studies intently from the first moment of awakening until just …
Check out the other Gallery entries here. I pester a lot. I try not to, I try to be grateful for what I have, but there’s just so much delicious stuff out there that it’s really difficult to pretend I don’t want it. So when Mummy asked me to stop and think about what I am grateful for I had to mentally change tack. Mummy tried to get me started by telling me what matters to her, but that was too predictable for me: me and the Bug, Daddy, health, a nice house, etc. Actually, once I got going it …
As the holiday season approaches, I thought it pertinent to raise the issue of air-travel with families – and those individuals who are not family-friendly. Whilst reading the Sunday papers last weekend Mummy had what can only be described as a coffee-snort moment. Apparently someone had written to the Sunday Times travel section complaining about the fact that families are allowed to share the same space as normal grown-ups. The author of the complaint had been compelled to sit next to a baby who not only failed to keep its arms and legs still, but who showed an unhealthy interest …
My Mummy is perfect. Most of the time. At least, I think she is. Which is why, when she’s cross with me – and after my frustration at the injustice of it all has dissipated – I write her little notes to say sorry. It works like magic. I get a hug, she says she’s sorry too, and if I really lay it on her I may even get some apology chocolate. Seriously, Mummy is a moody mare at times. She once (in a good mood) called herself ‘silly old Mummy’. She laughed when we agreed. I tried it again, to …
This week Sticky Fingers has given us the challenge ‘Mustachioed’ for our photo blog posts. Not being brave enough to put one on myself (the moustache would probably look better than any of the individuals in my family given the lack of sleep that’s been going on around here), and not owning a dog, we decided to plagiarise an idea from Toy Story 3.
Mummy belongs to Rock Choir, a no-audition, no-questions-asked singing (and a bit of dancing!) group. She joined after Christmas, thinking it would be a fun release from ‘being a Mum’, with maybe a couple of small local concerts occasionally. Fast-forward 4 months and she becomes one of a 7,500-strong group performing yesterday at Wembley Arena. Now I’ve had my moments in the spotlight, but that’s what I call Diva status! I’ve wanted to see Miley Cyrus in concert for many months now, but with M&D not splashing the cash for tickets, I was happy to settle for this as my …