Shoulda Woulda Could Of

 

If you’re anything like me, the title of this post makes your blood boil. It doesn’t? Read on…

As my children get older, I am increasingly concerned about social media. Ah! my family (and that teacher I met once) exclaim. At last, she’s seen the light! All that grooming and online bullying, not to mention the the dangers of accidentally clicking on something no young eyes should ever see. Thank goodness.

But it’s not that. I still firmly maintain that the earlier a child gains supervised access to social media, the more likely it is that he will learn to use it responsibly, and to understand that not everyone online is responsible. No, my problem is with the English language.

How terrible grammar on social media makes it difficult to learn English

Learn English image from Shutterstock

It all began with an item for sale in a Facebook group. A lovely chester drawers, three to collect. Hang on. Is it one, or is it three? I wondered. What period is a Chester drawers from? And shouldn’t it begin with a capital C? I discussed this with some online friends. It turned out, that chester drawers were not the only strange things for sale: I could also get a ward roab and some cubbuds if I felt so inclined, and what’s more, they were shabby cheek and only a tena!

I decided not to venture to the portal where everyone is called hun, and asked people to share their own thoughts on this new and alien language I struggle to speak. It was an eyeopener. Everywhere there were people looking for power rangers toys – but it must be cheep. There need to restock they’re cupboards with second-hand toys was right their in black and white. Someone was selling her toddlers cast-off trane engines, and they were going like hotcakes. People who’s children where craving the latest gadget would of paid double, and you was lucky if you managed to get an offer in before it was gone.

It’s not just toys that sell well on social media. Highly-recamended was a serviceable-looking bike – it had a puncher, but nothing that couldn’t be easily fixed.

Should I care? At the end of the day Facebook provides a valuable support service for information and virtual hugs. From tips on surviving the stress of take-off on an airoplane, to pacific instructions on where to find the train station. And I saw an amazing scon resapi up for grabs just last night. So maybe I shouldn’t let it bother me. But I do.

Now I am far from being a stickler for the Queen’s English. I have too much northern twang for perfection, and a likely lad with a mancunian lilt will leave me forgetful of my principles. But I worry that the internet is where children and teenagers are learning their spellings and punctuation. Or from that lovely young BBC Radio 1 DJ who talks about the housemates off of Big Brother. If this is the case, is the Oxford dictionary headed for a dual print-run of accepted words as language evolves too quickly for the grammar nazi’s to keep up?

What’s your take?

Children learning

Teacher and student image from Shutterstock

I leave the last laugh to Helen from Kiddycharts, whose young daughter told her that one day she would grow up to marry a penis. Of course, she meant to say Prince – a small, though fundamental error (albeit possibly not far from the truth). But hey, at least she spelled it right.

Disclosure: I included 20 grammar or spelling errors in this post that are not mine. Can you find them all? If you can, welcome to the grammar nazi club, I’m happy to meet you. If you counted more, please point them out. I’m not perfect. 

With thanks for their contributions to Kirsty, Annie, Andrea, Kelly, Carolin, Aly, Mari, Vicky, Cat, Emma, Jennifer, Cass, Stephanie, Sandy, and Tanya.

42 thoughts on “Shoulda Woulda Could Of”

  1. Brilliant post, Helen! As a non native English speaker, I get so frustrated by all those their instead of they’re and the many mother’s instead of mothers on my twitter timeline. Grammar is not a priority, apparently. And I won’t even mention the autocorrect gems one sees everyday on social media!

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  2. Aaagh! I am totally with you on this. Every one of those caused me actual physical pain. Being a grammar pedant (hell, I’ve made a career out of it), I was tempted to go back and count, but it’s late and I’m tired, so I will take your word for it on the 17!

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    • Oooh I wonder if you’d have spotted an unintentional mistake of mine?! Sometimes I know there are typos in here, but I’m hopeful that there’s never a grammar mistake.

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  3. One of my friends – intelligent and highly educated – just posted on FB about upcoming Father’s Day, stating “There is many outstanding Dad’s out there.” I about had a seizure, and went to vent to another friend of mine privately. I.just.can’t.

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  4. A brilliant post. Each and every one of the grammatical errors made me wince. I hadn’t realised I was such a stickler for grammar!

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  5. Here here! Couldn’t agree more. I got so fed up of it, I took myself off the local Facebook groups that were full of these. I used to think people were writing like that as a joke and then it gradually dawned on me that is genuinely how they thought it should be. We’ve just read through this as a family and even my younger son knew how to spell these correctly. We all found the marrying the Prince bit hilarious too. X

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    • I do think there’s a tendency to do lazy type when you’re on a phone, and I don’t correct my mistakes every time, but yes, it’s when I realised that people genuinely thought these were the right ways to spell and write, that I totally despaired!

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  6. What gets me is that 9 times out of 10 things like that are posted from phones that usually spell check for you!

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  7. scon resapi! I had to read that 5 times to work it out and only got it in the end by doing so loudly!

    GENIUS POST WILLS!

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  8. It actually physically pained me to read that. If there’s anything that’s likely to set me on edge, it’s appalling spelling and grammar! 🙂 Facebook groups have some ‘fabulous’ spelling mistakes.
    Puncher, though? Really?! My word. I’ll tell you what the quickest blog turn off is as well – badly written ones. If you can’t spell or write, stay off the internet! 😀

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  9. Argh. Yes, yes, yes.

    “Off of” is my current pet hate (amongst many). It’s rendered me incapable of listening to Ed Sheeran’s “Thinking Out Loud ” without wanting to do something or someone (mainly Ed Sheeran, to be fair) serious damage…

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  10. You know, maybe in my younger days I’ve have been in agreement, but as I get older and I meet more, and different sorts of people, I tend to be more forgiving.

    Not everyone has the benefit of the same quality of education, or the same capacity for learning grammar and spelling – and I think we can all imagine how it must feel to express yourself in writing when it’s not your strong point and have some graduate git mock you for your efforts – how easily and effectively are people silenced by that sort of treatment? At the end of the day, if writing isn’t your profession, or written communication isn’t a requirement of your day-to-day life then can’t we just be a bit more accepting, a bit more generous, maybe?

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    • Okaaaay! I’m going to assume that you didn’t just call me a graduate git Sally.

      I’m also going to assume that the folk who employ Scott Mills at the BBC know that ‘off of’ isn’t correct grammar, and that they no longer care what example they set. I get that some people struggle with grammar and writing, but where the heck are we headed if that just becomes an accepted norm, and no-one tries to do better? I get that accents and colloquialisms will happen too, and they don’t bother me in the slightest. But when people write and type those quirks in black and white, should the next generation adopt them as the norm, just because it appears to be so? Or should we say something about it?

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      • It’s not about being a graduate, it’s about basic education. One can assume that those old enough to be selling chests of drawers might have already left school and letting the odd thing slide is something we all do. I think Helen’s point is about such a lack of education becoming a way of life and, worse, accepted as such. There is no question that the standards in our schools have dropped – the teachers often spell things incorrectly, have no idea where apostrophes do and don’t go and today’s children are lacking the basic principles of plurals, as are many adults. Reading this post – with all those deliberate deliberate misnomers made me feel physically sick. This is normally such a safe, articulate space and I hadn’t appreciated quite how much so! Language evolves but this is the opposite of that and I also despair.

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        • That’s exactly it Anya! I’m not laughing here, I’m genuinely shocked and saddened at how prevalent it is. It’s not just an off the cuff remark, it seems to be a big deal everywhere on the internet. For a country that claims to have better and better exam results every year, we’re not doing very well.

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      • Ha! No, I’m the graduate git. You know, I was a professional writer and editor for the best part of 15 years and I am a huge supporter of the idea that clear, effective communication is one of the best tools someone can have. But I guess that was an easy view to hold when most of my circle were fellow writers, editors and graduates. It feels less important these days – when I read a powerful story on a blog,

        i remember having this argument with an editor on a cruise ship recently who was slating bloggers who, in her view, “can’t even write”. And I told her about some of the stories I’ve read on blogs, some of the posts that offer support, inspiration, information, and amazing insights into women’s lives and against all of that, the fact that someone confuses their and they’re starts to look pretty insignificant, and I felt like a heel for spending years judging people for that sort of thing. Yes, of course it matters, and in an ideal world the education system would work better, and give people better support in gaining those skills, but there are things that matter so, so much more. It’s just my take on it, I know not everyone agrees, though.

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        • I agree with Sally here. The education system isn’t in an ideal world either, so please let’s not simply blame education or teachers, as a teacher I have worked with kids who for so many reasons couldn’t always access the curriculum, from parents not supporting school, to special needs, to being disaffected, abused, in poverty, to the education system just being under ridiculous pressure. Yet so many people voted for an education system where teachers don’t have to be qualified. A qualified English teacher knows where to stick an apostrophe. Politicians keep heaping on more and more literacy drives, it is no wonder our kids are sickening of it and rebelling – I see it in my own daughter who made up a song today about how much she hates literacy! I’ve studied language change (as a graduate git), and I believe we have to embrace young people’s colloquial ways of communicating as well as sharing the ways of speaking and writing that will help them become successful in communicating in all contexts. Grammar nazis really sadden me, taking huge swings at people who make grammar ‘mistakes’ and poking fun, without always trying to understand the myriad of issues that are at play here. I often thing it is no wonder language users rebel when they are faced with these attitudes all the time. I almost didn’t comment here, as language has been in a state of flux for centuries, and these debates have raged on for decades. I genuinely think it is in safe hands!

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          • I think it’s a dual issue, and very complicated. I’m not making fun in this post at all – I’m genuinely distressed by the fact that this language is in type so frequently, and I do believe it makes it even more difficult for young people and children to figure out what is correct and what is not. Which leaves them vulnerable and disadvantaged when it comes to impressing prosepective employers.
            I do think education has to take some of the blame, and just because voters put that system in place doesn’t mean we should feel guilty for criticising it, or nothing will ever change. I know lots of amazing teachers, and I know that they do the best they can with what they have. I also think parents have to play their part, so as you say, it’s massively complex.
            But I don’t believe that everyone typing like this is doing it because they don’t know any better; I think some people don’t know, which is fine; some people don’t realise that there’s a time and a place for txt spk; and some people quite simply can’t be bothered – and that’s the bit I have a problem with.
            And yes, I am a stickler for grammar. That doesn’t mean I don’t respect people who aren’t as mindful of it as I am, and I’m in no way poking fun. I realise that some people do, but that’s not what’s happening here. I have family and friends I love and admire very much, who just don’t care, and that’s fine. But the extent of it worries me when children are seeing it all the time online.
            No idea what the answer is, but the debate is certainly worth having 🙂

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  11. I have to start by saying I think you’ve written a great post. I try hard to be grammatically correct and spell correctly. BUT there are large swathes of the population who aren’t skilled in this area. My husband being one of them.

    It used to frustrate me but then I realised that his school career was not on the same level as mine. He finished school after GCSEs, not leaving with many and in early school life had time out of school for hospital appointments. His parents were also not really academically gifted and I can see that if parents can’t help kids at home they’re on the back foot. Education isn’t just about the school you go to, it’s about the area you live in, the friends you have, your social background and although I dislike the use of all the examples you gave, i can see that a lot of those people don’t realise they’ve made a mistake. They’re doing their best.

    On the other hand I went to grammar school and uni and my parents took great interest in my education and I lived in a nice area and loved reading and writing.

    It doesn’t bother me so much anymore as I can see past my old mans spelling, he is a wonderful man, a great father and my kids have me around to balance out his deficiencies with the English language.

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    • All very good points Sharon, and I totally get that it’s just not an issue for some people. And actually, before social media it wouldn’t have been an issue for me either, now I think about it. But I think it does make it difficult for young people to learn if they’re seeing a lot of it online – v confusing for them.

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  12. You’re preaching to the converted here Helen, this has been winding me up for years! Honestly though? It really does worry me. The text speak that they all use in every day conversation and the emails….oh the emails! I deal with people at work who cannot string a legible sentence together when constructing an email. SUCH a shame. I really hope that the correct teaching of the english language does not die out anytime soon or I will die trying to resurrect it! I am glad that schools have brought this back into the curriculum, it really is so important.

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  13. I genuinely can’t STAND grammatical errors, drives me bonkers, and sets my teeth and everything else in me on edge. My mum was an English teacher, so I blame the genes. It is soooooooo hard not to pull up my daughter or son when they make mistakes as well, and we are encouraged not to do so, particularly as they learn phonetically first in my kids school. Thanks for including the Penis here – one day, I might even put the picture on my blog. I am starting to wonder though if I have left it a bit late, and I would just be too embarrassing now!

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    • Ah that was the icing on the cake Helen 🙂

      I’m totally happy with phonetic spelling in young children – I think it definitely helps them to learn how to express themselves and think freely, without panicking about whether they’re doing it right or not. But I wish it wasn’t one or the other. There has to come a time when spelling it right, and learning the correct construction of a sentence, paragraph, etc. becomes important. Otherwise where does all the great writing go? And how do we get the less-advantaged into the uni places and jobs that everyone demands we should?

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  14. This is interesting! I have often got into scraps discussions on social media about bad grammar and spelling, and the retort is always the same that in the grand scheme of things, it’s not that bad. Having now read many blogs (often some prolific, successful blogs) that are littered with errors, I can see that the content rules. Also, people who are writing from the heart, may not be the best at spelling but the fact they’ve articulated themselves so well, you’ve got to the let the errors go. Having said all this, I still cringe when I read definately, suprise, and incorrect use of its / it’s.

    Thanks for such a great post – I really enjoyed reading it. However, I was interested to see you used spelled as oppose to spelt. Any elaboration on your choice?!

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    • Both are correct Megan, apparently, though I stick with spelled because it’s what I learned in school. Spelt, for me, is that weird flour I can’t bake with 😉

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  15. This made me giggle, I hate the constant spelling and grammar mistakes you see online. It drives me mad! Whenever I read through my facebook timeline I find myself correcting people’s mistakes in my head. Of course, like you said, we’re not perfect, but the English language is suffering. Or at least I think it is.

    I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve had to correct my boys when they say “Could of”, but do they listen. Nope. They will, eventually I am sure – when they have kids of their own and they’re being driven mad themselves! 🙂

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  16. ‘Could of’ is my absolute pet hate! I am totally with you, and it does worry me. I’m just hoping that encouraging my kids to read and love books will help, as surely if they read the written word, as it should be written not Facebook updates, it will sink in? Hoping so!

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  17. Lol, this is brilliant! I see these kind of posts on my social media feed all the time and it drives me mad! “Could of” is one that always grates on me as does using the wrong version of “they’re”, “their” or “there”.

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  18. Great post and comments – not much to add, myself. I suppose I feel that I can only do an awful lot about my own communication and that of my (primary school-age) children’s; I don’t feel compelled to get angry about the way that other people write. If I do get angry about issues, I write to my MP or join a pressure group or campaign – it’s good to take action when you can.

    I realise that this is just me sticking my fingers in my ears, and shouting “LA LA LA!” but I have left facebook and twitter, so the cringeworthy grammar and spelling just doesn’t come under my radar any more. Try life without it, you might like it!

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  19. Where the number of characters are limited i can accept ‘odd’ words and autocorrect is mine and probably everyone’s worst nightmare. I have the ability to read past bad spelling or use of word such as their, they’re and there but I know many others can’t. If I’m sending formal communication i make sure I send it from my laptop and not my phone, so I can proof read correctly. Popping over from Morgan’s ‘What I read’

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  20. Brilliant post! This kind of thing drives me crazy. I’m far from perfect and mistakes are a part of human nature but some of the errors are just unbelievable, one day I’ll learn not to be surprised.

    Stopping by from Morgan’s ‘What I Read’

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  21. Wow. Just. Wow. I stay off my local Facebook group, partly because of spelling mistakes (although disaster would probably be a more appropriate word than ‘mistake!) like these (ouch!) and also because there are far too many narrow-minded people on them and I need to keep my blood pressure down. Generally though, my main pet peeve is apostrophe’s – yes, that’s deliberate! 😉 – randomly added everywhere! Grrr…

    Popping over from Morgan’s What I Read

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